Tag Archives: men

Toys should be a guy’s best friend

Howdy hooo hey… it’s been a minute and a day since my last blog post but that doesn’t mean the saucy filthy ish hasn’t been cooking in the silence.

 

(There will be a Little Black Book update coming in the next few days ‘cuz there has been some ish going down.)

 

Now we done got past the intro shit, let’s talk…

This subject has been floating in my head for the last few months so I decided to literally take a break from writing a story for Little Black Book volume 3 and put my fingers in it.

 

Now, in random conversations, one thing I’ve heard and still hear to this day is about the curse of the toy rejection.

This is nothing to do with Christmas or giving toys. This is about a particular cross section of men who are not too fond of their lady’s affinity for toys in the bedroom.

These men come with their egos on their dicks (see what I did there or did the cum miss you?) and they are generally bedroom rulers who know what their doing, don’t ever need to be told or shown when or how to do things and they believe their dick game is the Taj Mahal of sex. Absolutely nothing wrong with that, especially if you know that he is correct in his belief and can actually back it up.

But, it’s not his skills that I’m here to mumble about…

It’s his lack of appreciation for any other form of pleasure that the pussy he’s seeing to receives when he’s not around. Or even when he is around.

Her toys; her box of treats, the vibrating things she keeps under her pillow, the hard, long thing she keeps in her underwear draw, etc, etc.

 

He HATES those things!

 

Why? Because he feels like they are his competition. He feels like that toy or toys (depending on how lucky you are to have found that one toy that does it all) are his replacement and are there to make him feel obsolete. He hates those things. He hates to know that you are using it when he isn’t there, he hates the idea of you owning it period and he especially hates when you try and bring that toy/s into the bedroom when he is doing his thing.

OoOoOoOoOoOoOooo… wanna emasculate this type of man? Lay on your back, give him your ankles and get a good stroke going. That good, righteous, this is the shit kind of stroke and just when your both getting really into it, pull out your toy and watch his face.

You might as well have pulled an extra man from under your pillow.

 

Because that’s how he feels about your toy. In his head, he knows it’s ridiclious to say this out loud but he sees your toy as your other lover. When he’s done and gone home, you break out your toy and have them look after you until he returns. Sometimes, you ladies don’t even wait for him to leave before breaking the toy out. How DARE YOU WOMEN!!!

Some of you have heard of these men, some of you have met these men between your thighs, some of you are actually these men.

That kind of thinking is absolutely nonsensically, seriously and realistically stupid… and I’ll tell you why.

What are they called? Toys. And what are toys? Meant to be played with!

That’s generally it.

 

Toys are not just woman specific first of all. I know there are fleshlights and such toys for dudes but a woman’s toys are just as much for us as they are for women.

Secondly, the reason why I say that kind of thinking is stupid is because those men are thinking of the toys as an enemy, as something there to replace them, instead of looking at them as a bredrin, as a friend, as a tag team partner.

 

Having the fear of something else pleasuring your lady instead of embracing it is a one-way road to masturbating alone-ville. You see, ladies like their toys so making an issue about them will only push them closer to the toy and away from you, lol. Okay, that’s not true but you see what I mean.

You know what you should do… and I’m speaking specifically to those guys…

 

You know what you should do? Take the toy she likes to play with and spend some time with it. Become one with the toy. That toy should mean more to you than it does to her. Why?

Well put it this way…

 

BA Baracus was a bad mother SHUT YO MOUTH all by himself right? But with the other members of The A Team around him, they become a force of destructive nature, running through illegal hideouts and criminal gangs like a hot comb through tough hair.

Same thing.

Bruce Lee by himself… dangerous as fuck,,, but give him a pair of nunchuks and… well you saw Enter the Dragon (and if you haven’t then I judge you).

 

A man can be great in the sack but, with the mastery of toys under his belt and his already, hopefully, top notch dick game, he cannot be stopped. Her orgasms are gonna flow like a shiny glow of a soul. She’ll start having orgasms she’s never had before… and there are a few different types. (Hmmm… another blog subject me thinks.)

Basically, she’ll love you for it.

The head you get will be better, every position from here on out will have a more a stank face to it, her kisses will feel more intense, she may even let you get in the back door, loool. (Just kidding… but only a little bit of kidding.)

 

You know the best place to start when it comes to learning about women’s toys?

Masturbation.

Sit down in front of her and watch her masturbate with one of her favourite toys. Not hand down the panties type play, I mean, get her fully naked, get out her best toys and sit there with 3D glasses on and take notes.

Find out what her favourite toy/s may be and why. Find out what she uses the toy for and how it makes her feel. Find out how she uses the toy (‘cuz you’ll find that a lot of women use their own toys in their own way. So the 9-inch dildo could be the shit but then she could only use the clit attachment on the front ‘cuz it makes her cum quickly).

Get involved when she masturbates, throw a hand in, a tongue, an elbow even, do something but make sure you are touching her in some way, shape or form. Because you’ll learn shit.

You’ll learn things that she likes that you don’t do and which you can then add to your sexual CV and own new tools that make you a more well rounded love machine.

 

Prime example… I mentioned before about laying her back and having ankles in both hands… well that is the position I want you to go away and try and come back and let me know what happens.

Slide in in this position and get a great stroke going… THEN… let her pull out her favourite vibrating toy and put it on her clit while you are still sliding in and out of her.

I’m not talking about no rammer jammer shit… go through the whole gamut of sex strokes: fast, hard, slow, soft, barely moving, adjusting the angle you come in from, try it all and I GUARANTEE she’ll be a happy camper by the end and you, sir, will be the motherfucking man.

And you’ll have a new transferable skill for the CV.

PLUS…

Knowing how to play with a woman the right way is a great addition to foreplay and you can then take the toy from her and show her that;

  1. You ain’t afraid of her toy and,

  2. You know how to use a toy!

 

For those men out there who are comfy to take their lady’s toy and play her with it, you know what I’m talking about and you are fully aware of the beautiful, spraying results that come.

You dudes that don’t… tsk tsk tsk…

All I can say is that you are missing out.

 

Pay attention during masturbation time, man the fuck up and take the toy away from her and learn it and, for the love of God, stop thinking of her toys as your enemy…

 

Be like John Witherspoon in Boomerang – REVERSE IT!

 

BANG BANG BANG BANG!!!

 

By

 

Mr Oh  

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Who has to work the hardest for supreme intelligence, men or women?

Image

 

There’s no lengthy intro or fancy words to describe what the hell this blog is about.

This is a simple, straight to the point question.

 

Who has to work the hardest when it comes to head; men or women?

 

This was a random thought I had when I was fighting through writer’s block and couldn’t string two words together.

I was thinking about oral sex, as per usual, and I could picture a man giving a woman some brilliant cunnilingus and then, on the other screen in my head, I could see a woman giving a man what can only be called the ‘Lethal’ treatment (shout out to Lethal Lipps with all that spit and shit).

 

And I thought, who has to work harder for the pleasure?

Is it women who have to measure up and work out how they’re gonna take the dick to the jaw or is it men, who have to analyze and formulate a plan of pussy attack before orgasms curl down their moustaches?

For me, this is an interesting question because when it comes to that goooooood intelligence (that’s slang for oral sex, just for you uneducated), you need to know what it is your partner likes.

You need to know HOW your partner likes.

You need to know what works best and what levels of best you should apply with your mouth.

You need to know what makes your partner’s chest rise and fall with no trouble at all.

 

But, when it comes to doing the damn thing with your lips and your tricks, it’s not as easy as it appears to be.

So, I’m gonna look at both sides and, at the end, come to a decision (pardon the pun) and say who has to work the hardest with their mouth for an orgasm. In my own opinion.

You may agree, you may disagree, you may be disgusted, you may lick your lips and suddenly feel in the mood to have your lower middle tickled just a little… let’s see…

 

So… let’s start with the ladies…

 

DO MY LADIES RUN THIS… nah, let’s not do that!

Ladies, let’s start with you.

When it comes to head, your quest for intelligence lies at the end of a blowjob.

The old dick in the mouth something.

 

When done right, it can be as good as actual intercourse and when done DAMN right, it can forgo the intercourse and make him buss and have to issue a “this has never happened before” type of apology.

But what about the giver of such knowledge? What about her battle to get her man to the happy place, which is either happy enough that he knows you’ve got skills, hard enough that he’s ready to fuck or wet and shrunk enough that he is laying there trying to catch his breath as an orgasm took him by surprise?

A woman will tell you that giving head isn’t as easy as they make it look. To us men, it looks like it’s as simple as bob, weave, dip, swirl, purse of the lips, lick, etc. but there’s a fair bit they have to take into account. Such as the size of the dick they’re about to conquer, the sensitivity, even the man himself is a factor.

Dicks are not easy to deal with. They grow, they shrink, sometimes they’ll blow before you know it.

But let’s start at the initial ‘suck’ part.

Not easy at ALL, especially if your one of those women with a small mouth and your facing a rather large dick before you.

If you have a generally medium-sized mouth and, in your sexual career, you’ve been known to deepthroat 8 inches with ease, you still have a lot to deal with. If you’re blessed with a disrespectful pair of full lips and the ability to deepthroat more length than he owns, you’ve still got a lot on your plate.

He could be a rough throat fucker, maybe he wants you to take it all the way down your throat and your only used to taking it up to your tonsils.

Maybe he likes his dick suck wetter than a beach towel in a tsunami and you can only muster up a battery-sized amount of spit.

Maybe he wants you to drop techniques only seen in porn, while your style is more Tulisa than Italia Blue.

Maybe he likes his balls licked and you think they look like weird meatballs and you don’t wanna do it.

And then there’s lockjaw… and that just sucks ass in general, no ladies?

 

There’s a lot to sucking a dick.

A lot of work, breathing techniques, wretch holding, hand twisting and multi-tasking involved and that’s before she has to deal with what to do with the orgasm once it arrives.

Does she swallow, does she not, does she take it to the face, does she take it on her breasts or does she bend the dick back and make him cum on himself?

It’s a big decision.

A big decision for a big moment.

Cuz dicks… they ain’t easy to take, orally that is.

 

 

But then, on the OTHER side of it, there’s the work that the men have to put in when it comes to cunnilingus.

The moment between a woman’s thighs.

For a man’s quest for supreme intelligence, he has to have his head game on a hundred, thousand, trillion as Kanye would say.

 

When it comes to giving a woman head, there is a LOT a man has to take into account. It’s not just about opening her legs and putting your mouth where you see a button.

She may not necessarily like her button dealt with in that way.

Maybe she wants her pussy fucked with a tongue.

Maybe she likes fingers added with a particular degree of moisture.

Maybe she wants single laps up and down with her lips held open.

Maybe she wants to hold your head and direct you.

Maybe she likes being able to face fuck you while calling you a ‘dirty fucker’.

 

Maybe she wants to do all those things and more… but, you have to be ready. And you have to be adaptable.

You have to be able to react and listen to her, respond to what she likes, repeat the thing that made her back arch and be willing to search for more.

And also fight off the lockjaw AGAIN.

 

(Head ain’t head until someone gets lockjaw!)

 

Then you have to make her cum. Now if you’ve decided to go down on a woman then you HAVE to make her cum from it.

That’s the unwritten rule!

You don’t go to Costco and leave with a plastic bag of items, you leave with boxes. As many as you can take!

With so many zones of enjoyment in and around the vagina, you have to learn, and learn quick, what she likes to the point that her hips rise and fall because it’s started to feel that good. When you find it and you work it, you could be there for seconds or double figure minutes.

That’s the roll of the dice that comes with cunnilingus.

 

 

Now, in my opinion, who has to work the hardest for that SUPREME intelligence?

No disrespect to women and the work they have to put in when it comes to slurping and burping on a man’s Melvin but you have it easy in comparison to men.

 

And I’ll tell you why.

 

Women, you have one straight, up standing piece of work ahead of you, and two small assignments hanging below. Because of the shape of the upstanding piece of work and the two small assignments, you don’t have to venture far away from a repetitive movement on any of the three.

You know any part of his dick you touch with your mouth is generally gonna make him feel like its all good in the hood.

Working your mouth in a sweet, delicious way will be the medicine for his sickness.

Sucking the head with a bit of a slurp sound will make him harder than he ever thought possible.

A deepthroat all the way to the base of him will make his dick venture past your mouth and into your throat, and that’s a whole different type of feeling.

Maybe a bit of a gag sound, maybe a whole LOT of a gag sound could help.

Add saliva from a wet mouth and the inclusion of hands and ladies, you LITERALLY have men by the balls.

You know you’ve got that easy work when you blow him for five minutes or less and he’s blowing harder than Chinese math.

That’s that woman who found a way to give maximum pleasure with minimal effort.

Not knocking ya at all.

In fact GOD BLESS YA!

But you DO have it easier.

 

Men? *sigh*

 

We DO have a task on our hands sometimes, don’t we?

That lockjaw kicks in like a muuug and you have to find an adaptive style that helps rest ya jaw but keep the pleasure coming.

It takes a hot minute to find that EXACT move or combination of moves that makes it feel the way it should.

Unlike the phallus of man, woman is built with a sugar-walled reception area, equipped with a button that likes to be pressed but only a certain way. Inside this reception area are lovely walls lean on and touch and, if you have the tongue length, you reach the place deep inside the reception room that only most dicks reach.

If you work it wrong, it can instantly close up and monkey wrench anything further between you. You know what I mean when she has to reach down and show you how it should be done. And not showing you in the sexy way either. I mean that annoyed way where you can damn near hear her huffing and puffing in frustration cuz you’re just not getting it. And that never feels good.

Of course it bruises the ego!

We’re men, and we’re proud and we think that if we are eating your pussy, we have the skill and the ingenuity to work around until we enter the right combinations to unlock an orgasm.

She may like it this way…

That way…

Front ways…

Back ways…

Softly…

Nibbled just a lil bit…

Licked hard…

Feather like touches just over the hood of her clit…

She may need that bullet motion where you keep as much pressure on her clit with your tongue as possible… then hum.

Maybe she likes her clit enveloped between two fingers while gripping a nipple, tonguing her pussy jussssssst inside and to the right while humming The Cosby Show theme tune.

Or the classic straight fuck the pussy with your tongue and try and get it in as far as you can!

 

Who knows, the possibilities are endless.

 

As much work as it CAN be to find the right grooves for the song, its still a pleasurable experience and, when done right, can be enjoyed more by the eater than the plate of food writhing in ecstasy.

There is nothing more GRRRRRRRREAAAT than making a woman cum using your mouth. Then have her look down at you like, “well where the hell did THAT come from?”

Maybe you get the audio, moaning, shuddering then breathing heavy version but the message is the same.

 

Really, it doesn’t matter how hard either sex works when it comes to delivering that supreme intelligence, as long as they are willing to put in whatever work is necessary to get the job done. Whether that job is simply pleasing, warming up for something else, cumming or just to fill the time, put that work in.

 

Represent with your mouth and supply that SUPREME INTELLIGENCE!

 

BUT…

I did also hear bisexual women apparently give THE best head so maybe that just negates my whole blog…

Damn women… always gotta win!

 

 

So says

 

Mr Oh

 

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Tips about the tip

The inspiration for this blog post came from a voice I keep hearing in my head.
It’s a male voice and I imagine a lot of women have heard such a voice when its time to get down with the get down.
Usually said with a dose of heavy breathing, maybe some strong eyes locked and the sound of persuasion in his voice.
Bodies pressed together and its the moment when the dick either goes in or it doesn’t.

I’m talking about the moment when he says, “lemme just put the tip in…”
It’s a hilarious sentence in my head. It sounds like the most beggy beggy of statements but it pops up nonetheless.
That moment when everything leading up to it has been ten out of ten perfect. The foreplay got him warmed up perfectly and the head probably made him almost cum. Building him up so nicely that the only way to continue would be for him to slide in between her walls with no barrier between.
It’s already known and understood between him and her that when he says “lemme just put the tip in”, its not just the tip he wants to put in.
I mean, come on, how many times has it actually just been the tip that he’s put in?
When someone has fries, and someone says, lemme have one, they don’t take just one do they? No sirreeee… They take a combination of three or four because they know one will not do.
The tip is not enough to quench his curious thirst about how smooth and slick her sugar walls feel. For him to REALLY kill the curiosity cat, he’d have to taste a few strokes. Maybe a couple more strokes. And a few more after that.
Out the window goes unplanned pregnancy, sexually transmitted diseases and morals.
At that moment, all he wants is to feel.
So is the power of a woman’s vagina that no sloppy head or rubbing the dick against your clit will do.
All he wants is to be inside you.

The offer is just the tip..  but in his mind, he is thinking that if he can get the tip in, then he can convince you to let him stay there once he’s got a few strokes going.
Strokes that you will like enough to let him stay there.

Any woman reading this, maybe you’ve been there. You’ve heard him say that sentence, which comes in many variations, and maybe you let him.
Maybe you felt the tip and THEN some slip in. Maybe it felt nice. Real nice.
That damn tip.
Ever asked him to take it out after a few strokes more than the tip?
He wasn’t a happy camper was he?
Nope, because, to him, it wasn’t the plan to just put the tip in.
He wanted more than the tip all along. So you asking him to vacate the party absolutely pissed him off.
He’s thinking, “well you already let me in for free, why ask me to leave now? I’m already here.”
Tell a man to pull out and he’ll probably say something along the lines of, “c’mon babe, just lemme stay here for a second”, “I won’t cum I promise” or “I’m already here…”
The classic is to continue to convince you with some well placed strokes that, he hopes, will reach that part of your pussy that controls your decision-making and you change your mind like, “well that last stroke DID feel good, okay then, stay for the rest of the party.”

Regardless of if he’s just met you or you’ve been seeing him for a while or if your in a relationship and its the first time you’ve had sex, he’s been sizing you up the whole time, wondering if he can get away with throwing the request in and getting away with it.
It’s like the episode of Friends when Chandler took Joey to view Richard’s apartment. (Richard being Monica’s ex.) When they got there, Chandler found a tape with Monica’s name on it and he and Joey assumed it was a sex tape. And what did Joey say?
“If a woman says yes to being taped, she’s not gonna say no to much else.”

That is the thinking of a man that says, “lemme put the tip in…”
He hopes his dick, unsheathed and strong, will convince you that the tip is worth it. And if he can get you to come round to seeing things his way, you won’t say no to much else.

This isn’t a post that is judging anyone who DOES let him leave the tip in. I know dick can be a convincing sunnuvabiscuiteater when its ready.
And he’s hoping that he has the slick power of an Apprentice winner to convince you, with his dick, that, behind the tip, is the width and girth of a good dick that will feel amazing.

The hope of the tip is the hope of a man being able to charm a woman enough that her choices and decisions to NEVER let a man put the tip in get thrown out the window.
Trust me, ask any man who’s put the tip in and I’ll bet you he put more than the tip in. And he felt like the BAWSE afterwards.

The tip is not just about getting someone, who may already disagree, to agree to unprotected sex.
It’s about being able to be charming enough, smooth enough, that damn slick enough to break her down enough that she becomes so embroiled in the moment that she let’s you.
There’s an element of power shifting going on when they decision is made by a woman.
Once she’s made that decision, tip in or no tip in, he knows whether he’s GOT you or not.
A woman has all the power in the world when that choice comes up.
Believe me, tell a man he can’t put the tip in and watch him deflate. Not physically but it’ll mean to him that he wasn’t slick enough to make you change your mind.
It’s a slap to his ego.

For some men, agreeing to the tip means every sexual encounter you have from then on, he won’t have to ask. He’ll just come to the party without having to ask. It’ll be expected.

The tip is an unspoken power struggle between a man and a woman.
But, don’t think the tip JUST means the tip.

It’s SoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo much more than that.

By
Mr Oh

Little Black Book – the trilogy – by Mr Oh

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Apparently, some of you guys aren’t…. really….

This isn’t even a letter, this is response to a cry for help coming (pun intended) from women all over the world.
It’s a cry that can be heard in multiple languages, through women of different shades and shapes in the past, present and future.
But men do NOT hear the cry.
Maybe because some of us CAN hear it but we ignore it, maybe we can’t hear it AT ALL, maybe women cry these tears on a sonic audio level men are just not trained to hear.
But what I do know is that women are crying…
Not literally and physically crying but they are UPSET… and PISSED off.
Why?
Because the man in their life is NOT, repeat, NOT handling his business between the sheets as he should be. But he THINKS he is.
Ladies know him well; he doesn’t need to ask if it’s good because he KNOWS (or thinks) it’s good, his game is soOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo on point that he doesn’t need to learn anything from anyone, he is such the experienced lover that he assumes that what works for previous lovers will fit you and, thus, no need to try new shit.
Unfortunately, this gentleman lives and breathes everyday, with no one telling him any different, which makes him think that fingering you in THAT way (all dry and shit) is the way to get you off.

For some men, they cannot stand and/or take the fact that a woman would have something to say about their game. Kinda ironic but ‘how can a woman have something to say about a man’s sex game?’
He built this game from teen years, he spent time perfecting it and masturbating it into a well rounded, entertaining, orgasm-creating, sleep-inducing whale of a time.
He is super proud of that sex game and he will not, repeat NOT, hear one bad word about it.
But, then comes the awkward moment. When a lady experiences the sex game and has one or two amendments she would like to add to the game.
But he won’t hear such madness.
A WOMAN NOT IMPRESSED WITH HIS GAME!?!? HOW VERY DARE SHE?!?!

After he spent so long perfecting it?
Then comes the situation where you either tell him about it and suffer the consequences of him trying and improving, trying and steadily getting worse or he feels so emasculated, he gives up fucking you completely as he thinks you’ll constantly be slating him in your head.
Really, that’s HIS business… kinda his fault for not keeping his game up-to-date but that doesn’t mean he can’t take advice on how he can step it up.

So I thought, lemme try and tell HIM what he’s lacking and where, so the next time he wants to give his partner some pudding… some SWEET sticky toffee pudding, her mind will be filled with nothing but dick… or tongue.
In thinking about this blog and the subjects that I’d cover, I thought I’d ask my Twirrer folk and my FB peeps, and they came up with a few ideas and went QUITE hard with it…
So in a classic Ricky Ricado voice, I got some ‘spalaing to do…

So, what are the things that dudes need some advice on in between the sheets?

Losing inhibitions and letting go – some men find it easy to just let go of their inhibitions and let their woman sneak a finger up their ass, but not all men are that way inclined. When you find yourself holding on to certain ideas and rumours, etc. about sex, you instantly inhibit yourself when you find yourself in THAT situation.
For example, it can take a lady to say once ‘I don’t like that’ to inhibit him into locking down and not trying anything else adventurous with you. Not because you said you don’t like it, but because it was something he was doing that DIDNT work for you.
Men like to feel like they know it all so when a woman has to tell him or show him, he feels like, “I must be a shit lover if I don’t know how to do that”.
Realistically, life is too short to be holding in inhibitions… WAY to short to not be doing things that you’ve possibly THOUGHT about but, for whatever crap reason, you’ve changed your mind.
Apparently men sometimes OVER think sex. Could be a number of reasons for that. They wanna make sure the sex is PERFECT, they wanna make sure they give her something that she can run and tell her friends about or they wanna ensure you have something to think about LONG after he’s left.
But in over-thinking, he spends too much time inhibiting himself and not letting go. It should be the opposite.

One style of sex does NOT fit all – women are like cars, different ones, big ones, small ones, thick one, loose ones, some with goods brakes, some with great engines, some with terrible body work, etc.
But you cannot have one driver driving different cars the same way. Some have different biting points, some have tight biting point, etc… you know what I’m trying to say.
But there is not one style that fits all.
That would be a mistake to think so. One style of sex does not fit all.
Some women like to be driven roughly, some women like to be slow rolled into their orgasm, some like to go so fast, you’re breaking multiple speed limits.
But the aim is make sure you keep your game ever changing. Switch it up homes. Speedy during that part and slow and steady during that part.
Mix it up… but also, make sure you keep one style in your pocket that is ALWAYS, without a doubt, guaranteed to make her curl up, twitch up and orgasm up the place.

Too fragile or too rough – you cannot sir… CANNOT think that one woman likes it real soft or real fast, without keeping a comfy balance in the middle. Women rule ya see, and the thing about em is that they like to be paid attention. Paying attention can be sooo detrimental to your reputation as a good lover that you need to do it more and more and, even after she’s come, keep doing it.
Some women like it softly softly at all times, which builds up an orgasm slowly to a SUPER crescendo. But other women like it hard, fast and with as much Wesley Pipes in it as possible. And some like a mix of both soft and rough. What you have to do, dude, is make sure you know who you have so you know what to deliver. Rough, soft, fast, slow, figure her out before you get in…

Toys – men who are scared of toys are looked at like men who don’t give head – they still MAKE you. (Don’t worry, there’s a head section a coming…)
But toys are some serious kinda fun when it comes to using them on a woman during sex. A lot of men have issues with a woman’s toy in the way that they feel like it’s a replacement for them. For some women it is, for some women it’s all they have but take it into consideration. A Rampant Rabbit can be an added extra to any sex AND it can be a use to you too.
Never had a woman turn her Rampant Rabbit on a slow setting and hold it against your dick while getting a blowjob? Well then you’ve never lived my son.
If that’s a bit to close, and you can’t over the idea of having something that looks like a penis so close to your manhood then take control of the toy. Use it on her. Not only is it a good way to learn what strokes make her arch her back but throw in some nipple and neck kisses and just spend some time watching her come.
OR… lay her on her front with a pillow under her stomach and a vibrator around where her clit is and stroke her from the back. She’ll enjoy the sensation… and she’ll also appreciate the creativity of something different. Shows you are on the CUSP of knowing a thang or three.

Let HER drive – it is generally thought that a man in the bedroom has to be a leading, idea-delivering, bright spark of a lover in order to keep his partner pleased. But, women also like the opportunity to lead the party. Maybe he’s unable or unable to trust a woman to the point where he let’s her take control. But really, seriously and honestly, a woman taking control and telling you where to go and move and be with a strong voice is some SEXXXY shit.
Her breath is all heavy, she’s moving you quickly into position, her eyes are mesmerising and you can read on her face what time it is.
The strength women have in their own sexuality makes them know how and where they want it. And sometimes we fellas miss the mark. To be honest, there’s something sexy about watching an annoyed woman not being reached in one position and flipping him into another position. Her annoyed face suddenly becomes a “WHOOOOOA” face and everyone’s smiling.

Mind sex – the beautiful aspect of sex. Before anyone touches, before words are even spoken, the connecting on a level where you’ve both shared a sexual moment in the mind. Apparently the art of good mind sex is dying out in favour of the more ‘so are you gonna bang doe/ you let my friend slam doe’ style of chat up line.
Good mind sex can make a woman wet. Damn rigght.
Great mind sex, and I mean GREAT MIND SEX, is when you are both NOT talking about sex. If you’ve tasted that flavour, you know what I mean. When you could be talking about something random, yet there is something ELSE going on that you both know about.
To masturbate a woman’s mind before you masturbate her elsewhere is to heighten and enlighten ANY situation. And that’s fa trill….

Loss and lack of foreplay – it seems foreplay is still a dying experience for most women, with a lot of fellas opting to slide a finger in before maybe kissing a neck, undoing her zip properly or even reaching for a nipple. Foreplay can be more important than the actual intercourse. It LITERALLY pre-moistens the sex.
Foreplay has seemingly been defined today by a certain standard which, I seriously cannot fathom. Stop me if you’ve heard this one.
A kiss. Maybe a good few minutes.
Maybe a cup of the breast searching for a nipple
OR
A cuppage of your behind.
Followed by a search around the front for where he THINKS your clitoris is. Or he’ll go straight old school try slide in without having to undo any buttons or zips.

Foreplay is meant to be fun, not a chore as its seen in favour of a quick slam. No more caressing, no holding, no inhaling the one you plan to devour.

Learning how to interact – some fellas out there apparently don’t know how to simply interact with a woman anymore during sex.
How to simply adapt to her move and come forth with a worthy rebuttal. I mean really, has sex really just become about the act when these are the things that woman say men need to work on?
I mean C’MON SON. These are basics.
Interacting with a woman is all about paying attention to her. A dem cliché whe dem seh she’s always giving you signs. Well she is.
Pay attention to her. She could want you to pull her hair and want you to call her a bitch, but you won’t know because you’re not willing to put the WORK in.

Head game – apparently not only are women suffering from the fellas out there who aren’t giving head but there’s supposedly a growing number of gents out there who ARE giving head but just SUUUUUUUUCK at it.
Like REALLY suck at it.
This is head so bad she has to fake an orgasm to tell you to stop.
Generally when a man doesn’t like giving head but DOES, he’s not necessarily thinking about making sure you’re clit is licked, not flicked, tongue fucked, not long stroked. He just wants to get it over with and wait for the moment when you’ve had enough and motion for him to get back to some sex, which she can actually enjoy.
I’ve written so many blogs on giving head, I can only refer them to those and pray they read.

Dirty talk – ladies are apparently getting tired of the run of the mill ‘oh yeah’, ‘uhh huh’, ‘that’s it’, ‘ohhhhh right there’ and anything inspired by Wesley Pipes. This is fun because you get to explore what a woman likes verbally during sex.
She could be a quiet, shh shh, shut the fuck up kinda woman or she could be a ‘tell me how it feels, watch that shit going in, describe everything that happens type of lady.
Eitherway you gotta give her more than the ‘oohs’ and ‘aaahs’.
There’s something sexy to be said about the sound of a woman talking in a tone that tells you all you need to know about what she’s thinking and feeling.
Push the boat out, see how far she’s willing to go. Maybe she likes being called every piece of vulgarity in the book, maybe even some that don’t make sense. But you never know, because you don’t try.
And this is where some men are losing out.

Because they are not going the extra mile, they aren’t finding out just how far the road of a woman goes.
Unfortunately this diminishes the sexual experience down to just laying down or bending over, sliding in and out, buss, clean up, and gone with the wind.
Which sucks because that means that there are hundreds of thousands of women out their who’s full sexual potential is not being reached.
As men, it’s not wrong to take a bit of friendly advice on where to go, what to do, how to do that better…
Most of these seem to be things that men can improve all by paying attention, taking their time and savouring, instead of speeding, through a moment between the sheets.
I’m not slating men, I know some dudes who take care of their biznass with many a satisfied customer… but to those who AREN’T aware that a quick finger on what you THINK is her clitoris is not the extent of foreplay, I’m talking to you.

Really, all you’re doing is giving her and her friends something to laugh about. Because they ARE laughing at you. Then again, they could not be talking about you. That’s when you know it’s THAT bad.

Say something or do nothing…

By Mr Oh

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Are you a bi-enabler?

To bi or not to bi that is the question… not really a question though because really, to men, bi-sexual women run the world…
Obviously I wouldn’t make such a statement without backing it up but, there’s an element of truth there.
In today’s society where sex is LITERALLY everywhere, the human sexuality is changing and evolving (I’ve watched two two Disney films and heard a joke that has gone over the heads of the kids but adults looked at each other like, ‘did you just hear that?’)
Over the years, with homosexuality becoming more accepted by society at large, to the point where you can see a gay kiss on a soap with no big announcement in the paper a week before, the creation of the bi-sexual woman (not in a lab or nothing) has come across to men like a Bat signal to mojos everywhere.
How and why?
Well, a bi-sexual lady is a woman who likes both men and women. This, in turn, gives her more options than a heterosexual woman who only likes the meat between her sheets.
Some may call them greedy, some may call them lucky ‘cuz if there’s a man drought, they have other options, some even believe that because they are bi they have a higher level of promiscuity. That’s crap, crap and crap…
That’s on that same kinda shit where dumb people are worried to leave their kids around gay men for fear of them being abused…

But the power of bi-sexual woman lies in the fact that men like to THINK that they will ALWAYS be open to the opportunity of a threesome.
And we all know a threesome is HIGH UP on the list of a man’s sexual fantasies, even though he doesn’t really think of the logistics of a threesome REALLY.
I mean c’mon son…

A threesome ain’t easy on a good day… so before you let your dick makes decisions your stamina can’t cash, think about it.
Women have ALWAYS been on their job sexually, so what makes a man think he can please them both sexually?
But this blog isn’t really about the ways and ways threesomes take place, but more about the men who purposely seek bi-sexual women in order to enable them to do their bi-sexual thing… WITH them.

Seee, when a man meets a woman for the first time, maybe first or second date, he will go through the normal question and answer session, attempting to learn. But, at the same time, the questions he’s asking can be loaded with intention which doesn’t surface until much later. Some men will come straight out and ask, ‘have you ever been with a woman?’ and some men will ask, ‘So… do you think Anjelina Jolie is sexy?’
All with the intention of finding out just HOW into women you are. Now, bi-sexual or even bi-curious ladies out there, know that when they’ve told a man that they have had or want to have a bi-sexual experience, his eyes have lit up like Christmas lights.

Yeah, I’ve been guilty of such but that’s because you’re mind instantly thinks, “yummy, she likes her juice from the furry cup… WINNING!”
And before you’ve even had another date, you are already thinking:
who do I know bi-sexual who’d be down
what website do I know where I can meet bi-women
who was the last woman I know who was looking for some pussy

We can’t help it, it’s automatic… Men get that kinda face that JD on Scrubs gets when he goes off into one of his daydreams.

At that point, we become enablers. Exactly like those people that like to give their fat partners food because they know they like it.
Men become bi-sexual enablers, hoping they can get their lady another woman to enjoy. But, really, it’s not about seeking extra pleasure for the woman. It’s ultimately about HIS pleasure, what he can take part in, what he can sit back and watch, what he can record and watch back at his own pleasure.
Sure, her pleasure is, like, one of the things he wants to get out of it but it’s not the most important. And that’s at the heart of every enabler.
A person who’s partner is on drugs takes some pleasure out of seeing their partner no longer fiend for what they desired.
A person who’s partner likes to eat takes joy in seeing their loved one eating a McDonalds EXTRA LARGE double cheeseburger meal with large drink and two apple pies.
A person who’s partner is bi-sexual LOVES LOVES LOVES seeing their sexy beautiful lady head first in between a pair of thighs.
All for their own enjoyment.

The bi lady’s fun is secondary to his needs, which is to watch the sensuality of two women locked in a passionate tussle of arms and legs. A clench so sexually inviting he’s watching and salivating, analysing and masturbating, enjoying while feeling exhilarated. Imagining himself in between the lips of both ladies, an insect on the moment when both breasts touch and the edge of a finger nail when it finds the opening of another woman.
So maybe I’ve thought about it once or thrice but still, I’m not the point of this blog post.
You enablers are.
You hungry, self-pleasuring, egotistical maniacs who’s only desire is to get off watching or playing with two women – JUST because the opportunity is there. Not whether or not they want to or whether or not it’s in their plans at the time to do such a thing… it’s all about you…

Good old selfish you…

Well kudos to you sir… well done madam…
Because it’s not just men who are the enablers… there are some women out there who like to be enablers too…
For SOME reason, there’s a specifically Open Minded person who I know-ish who makes me think she might be an enabler if given the chance. (hehehe)

Eitherway, seeking out bi-sexual women just for your own selfish reasons of group sex, threesomes and porn recordings which soon find their way onto sites like homegrownfreaks.net, but disguising them as YOU allowing your partner to be who she is? Tut tut tut…

Bi-sexuals… or even bi-curiousessssesssss, watch out for these folk.. they’re out there looking for you to fulfill their own fantasies…

Like Bob Marley said, “don’t let ’em fool ya… OH NOOOOOO!”

By Mr Oh

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Do’s and don’ts of sex

Do’s and don’ts of sex…

This is in no way shape or form a DEFINITIVE guide on what you should and shouldn’t do during sex (I mean I may put my tongue where others won’t, plus if it was, this would be a BITCH of a list) – so let’s just get that out the way…

SEX

I talk about it, do it, write about it, think about it, taste it, visualise it… I just like it.
But, as we all know, there is an unwritten unspoken set of rules that people GENERALLY adhere to in order to fully succeed in achieving that REAL good, make her thighs shake, make him walk like an Egyptian, sweat dripping, body trembling sex.

These are 10 do’s and don’ts for the best way to achieve the sex that your friends TELL you they have… unless you’re freakier than them…

DO’S

 1.

PAY ATTENTION – a simple, but HUGE start. Watch what makes your partner tick, what makes her voice hit that Mariah Carey octave or what makes him grab all over your body because he doesn’t know what to do with his hands. Chances are, if you are hitting that SPOT the right way, and you keep doing it, someone’s gonna be coming soon.

WOMEN: If a woman moans when your twist her left nipple, breath on her right one, with one finger on her clit and another making it’s way in, then she LIKES it. DUH! So remember that move and add it to your mental rolodex.

MEN: Anything that gets his toes curling, face frowning or anything that makes him open his mouth in a perfect O is a keeper.

 2.

 BE DARING – why not try a spank from on high? Or rub the space between his balls and his anus during head? There are still a lot of hang-ups about particular sexual practices in the world but, to be honest, the quietest of people will like the freakiest of things.

WOMEN: If your head is telling you to suck his dick like a porn star, armed with porn star wrist action, dirty talk and saliva, then try it.

MEN: If you want to lift her legs back PAST her head and lick her ENTIRE crotch, what’s stopping you? What have you got to lose? Besides a possible eruptive orgasm.

3.

 ALWAYS BE PREPARED – at one point or another, we’ve all finished and realised that the ‘clean up towel’ is out of reach or the flannel is in the bathroom and SOMEONE has to get up. But no one wants to move. So make sure, you’re ready for any eventuality.

MEN: If you plan to tie her up, but she doesn’t know it yet, make sure you tie up the restrains before she even gets to the bedroom. Hide things under the pillow, under the mattress, etc.

WOMEN: are generally prepared because they decided they were gonna sleep with you about two days ago AND how it was going to go.

 4.

LET IT ALL GO – that’s the best way to be… free as a bird… not thinking about your Tesco’s shopping list or if it is CSI Miami or CSI Vegas on today… your mind should be on the task at hand. Distractions can lead to sudden situations such as:

WOMEN: leaving your mind temporarily and saying the first name that comes out of your mouth, even if it isn’t the name of the person above or below you. (It’s happened…)

MEN: not really feeling the way she’s working you, and the dreaded DROOP kicks in and no amount of looking or touching is getting it back up.

 5.

SWALLOW – there is nothing like watching or listening to someone slurping down the fruit juice of your labour… especially if you’ve been made to wait or have CHOSEN to wait it out. If you’ve been made to feel the way you should, you will WANT swallow what is coming to you… but if you’re not having your scratch itched, it could also brighten up the most boring of sessions.

MEN: don’t be scared of pussy juice… it won’t scald you… or turn your skin green. If you’re reading this and saying something along the lines of ‘I don’t go down for nobody’, then YOUR missing out… TRUST ME!

WOMEN: what is there to say about swallowing that you don’t already know? Nothing… just make it wet and deep and God bless ya!

DON’TS

 6.

 BODIES ARE NOT TOYS – whether you stroke the dick with too much kung-fu grip or your fingernails are too long to slide inside, you gotta make sure that YOU are representing yourself. Groom yaself, take care of the body you bring to the table and the body you are trying to please… it is there for your pleasure, not for you to treat like some old t-shirt that you paint in.

WOMEN: a few things to always remember – a strong grip on a dick isn’t ALWAYS necessary. Sometimes, men keep quiet, but we don’t like for our head’s to look like they’re about to explode. Teeth too. You gotta remember to keep them teeths covered… they have ROUGH edges… a grimace isn’t always in pleasure.

MEN: groping is fine to an extent but you have to be given the permission, otherwise keep it smooth and constantly moving. Another thing, not ALL women like a ‘rammer jammer’ in bed so don’t think that ramming her THROUGH the headboard will make her come. I did say, not all, because there is a fair share of women who don’t mind that all night long.

 7.

KEEP TOILET GAMES IN THE TOILET – not much of a fan of being pissed or shit on to be honest… but some people do… to each their own… but, if you ARE into that type of thing, MAKE SURE the other person is too. Because you don’t want her to be coming like a geyser then you stand over her and take a number two. This touches on ‘DO number 5’, but men HAVE to know the difference between a woman coming in their mouth and a woman peeing. If you don’t then… HAHAHAHAHA… take that shit to the grave… YOU got caught slipping.

MEN: just don’t do it.

WOMEN: just don’t do it either… leave the golden showers for private time on the can.

 8.

SENSES – it’s one thing for your body to not be into it, but for your eyes and mouth to show disinterest is a REAL mood killer. If you’re lying there, like a rag doll, forcing yourself into position, huffing and puffing when something feels wrong, rolling your eyes, fixing up your mouth like you’d rather be drunk, etc. It’s not a good look. And, in turn, the performance from both participants will suffer and the orgasm could just be to get it out the way so one of you can sleep. Why are you fucking in the first place?

WOMEN: though a lot of sexual emphasis regarding sounds is put on women, you DO make our engines roar when we hear the road enjoying the ride. If you’re not feeling it, it’s better to keep it real and just say, ‘you know what, we need to stop!’ Better that then feeding his ego, making him feel like he ROCKED the Casbah, when really, you were mentally fucking someone else.

MEN: do not restrict your vocab in the moment to ‘uh’, ‘oh’, ‘um’, ‘yeah’, ‘that’s it’ and, my personal favourite, ‘oh yeah’. Give it some variation, throw a, ‘bet you can’t get it all in your mouth’, or a sly, ‘look how big your mouth is, I know you can do better’. (Though the last one could STOP everything and turn her into, ‘what do you mean my mouth is big? What, you saying I talk too much? See, I knew it… my girlfriends told me about you.’ And you watch her walk away. So CAREFUL!)

 
9.

 WALK THE STRUT IF YOU’VE TALKED THE GAME – there is nothing worse than bragging about your CRAZY head game or your WEST BANK dick that will have her screaming, ‘GAZAMISEH’… and NOT delivering the product advertised. Don’t promise a porn star performance if you know you only need two positions to get your nut and drop to a quick slumber. Keep it real with yourself. Only offer what your willing to give. That way there’s no expectations.

WOMEN: Give him what he ordered or what you provided for him on the menu… if you’re willing to go that extra mile, let him know, or spring it on him when his mind is somewhere else.

MEN: okay… now… men have a tendency to talk a good game more than women do. But that’s because the onus is put on men to MAKE the sex good for both of you. Plus, it’s not our fault… unfortunately, and it’s yet to be scientifically proven, but, our dicks sometimes speak for us. So when the opportunity to talk sex arises, so does our junior selves. And they like to talk about all the things they can do, based on past experiences, but every time is different. So don’t think that you’ll be able to fuck for four hours like you did with your ex, and then come after five minutes. Which leads me on to my next point… you cannot… repeat CANNOT blame a case of premature ejaculation on her ‘good pussy’. They don’t buy it guys.

 10.

SEX TOOL KIT – sex is not a plaster on a stab wound of a relationship, it will not FIX your problems, mend your broken heart or define your status on this planet. It will make you feel good for… as long as you can make it last for. Someone is thinking about having sex right now for all the wrong reasons, but, to them, they can’t see anything but legs in the air. It is a temporary euphoric release that dissipates after you’ve caught your breath after an orgasm… or had that bomb diggy nap. Because if you’re having sex to hide, mask or fix something, the pain of the wound will still be there.

WOMEN: rule sex, don’t let it rule you.

MEN: it may seem like the GALICE thing to do but sex is not a badge of honour.

Maybe you agree with my do’s and don’ts, maybe you think I’m way off, but, hey, you’ve been entertained!

Be good with it…

Peace and hair grease

Mr Oh

DON’T FORGET: Little Black Book – OUT NOW via amazon and all good internet and book shops

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